Another note on abuse culture

jasminethey:

“You can always move out”

No, no you can’t. If you’re financially dependent on them, it’s NOT that easy. And what I find is that assholes tend to shift the blame from the abuser to the victim because they chose to stay in that situation.

Shitty friends eventually leave you because they can’t understand why you can’t just move out or ask them to stop abusing (really bitch?). They get tired of you discussing your abuse but not taking any of their advice. They’ll just write you off as whiny, indecisive and worst of all pathetic. 

See, there’s this bullshit notion that the victims can just “leave”. Like they have that option. There’s always that one choice left but that really depends on your financial and mental state. That choice isn’t really an option for some people. It will tell you a fucking LOT that a person is “choosing” to stay in an abusive situation rather than be homeless.

Basically, when you start telling people or hinting at victims to “just leave” your contributing to the idea that they are at fault for enduring the abuse. The fault ALWAYS lies with the abuser.

It took me a long time to come to terms with this. But I just wanted to tell people that staying in an abusive situation is NOT an excuse for someone to continue abusing you.

You think this shit would be simple to understand…

via Tumblr http://knittingandsljivovica.tumblr.com/post/37527054608

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